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hayley.rissler

Happy Mother’s Day! 🥰

Happy Mother’s Day! 🥰

I’ve been quiet, but with the possibility of Roe

I’ve been quiet, but with the possibility of Roe v Wade being overturned, I am actively trying to calm the angry fire within me.

I was pretty staunchly pro-life my whole life… until I got pregnant. I could write chapter after chapter about how life-changing pregnancy is, but it still wouldn’t resonate with you until you’ve experienced it.

It was a huge decision for me to have our second child. I won’t get into all the details of my second pregnancy, but you can read it on my blog.

Cliff notes: I went in for my first ultrasound at 8 weeks and the tech couldn’t find a heartbeat. It’s been almost three years and I still can’t write that sentence without crying.

I had a missed miscarriage. A pregnancy loss. Almost a month after my baby had passed, I decided to get a D&C because my body was not miscarrying naturally.

A D&C is the same procedure as an abortion.

Hospitals who won’t perform abortion procedures are also limiting the options for those who have miscarriages.

Had I not elected to get a D&C, I could have eventually developed a fatal infection.

It’s not just abortion rights. It’s women’s health rights.

There are so. many. reasons. women decide to have an abortion procedure. Maybe their baby won’t live outside the womb. Rape. They’re homeless. They have suffered from postpartum depression, anxiety, or psychosis.

Maybe the life-altering experience of going through pregnancy and birth is not what they want.

When I was suffering from postpartum depression, I honestly could not have imagined going through another pregnancy again at that time. If that had happened, I would have wanted the CHOICE for my future, because I was already crying in all the closets in my house.

For this being the “land of the free,” the government forcing me to birth a child, THE most life-altering thing I’ve ever experienced, sure doesn’t feel very “free” to me.

Feels a little “Handmaid’s Tale.” 😑

And don’t even get me started on the lack of support women receive after birth. 🙄

So, this is my post to stomp my feet in protest and yell from the rooftops. Maybe with any luck, my story will resonate with someone who starts to think a little differently.

14 minutes. Today I got outside and ran for 14 mi

14 minutes.

Today I got outside and ran for 14 minutes.

For years and years I always pushed myself to run faster and longer and harder. If I couldn’t meet some made up benchmark in my head, then I felt super disappointed in myself. That’s what you do when you have run countless races in your life. 😅

Then about a year ago, I realized that got me nowhere. And it was dumb. So I just started walking with NO expectations.

Just walking. Even just for 5 minutes around the block.

After about a month, I got the urge to run. So I ran SLOWLY and forced myself to walk again the minute I had a negative thought towards running.

By the summer I was up to 4 miles!

Then Arizona summer happened and my running life died. 😭

Finally yesterday I got the urge to run, so today I ran. For 14 minutes. And the minute I thought, “ugh I’m getting tired,” I walked.

It was a good 14 minutes. A slower-than-past-me-would-have-found-acceptable 14 minutes. Maybe the next time I run it will be 9 minutes. Or 19. But all those are good.

Just a reminder that if you’ve been any sort of athlete in any season of your life, you don’t have to live up to any benchmark or number or stat to start enjoying it again.

Not sure I’ll ever want to run a marathon again, but I’d like to be able to do a 10K when the mood hits. 😅

Their favorite hang out spot. 😂🥰 It is so s

Their favorite hang out spot. 😂🥰

It is so special seeing them bond. Maybe one of the most special parts of being a parent for me so far. Natalie loves “HUGS!!” and will go in for big hugs from Griff. Then want 100 more 😂🥰. Of course, Griff also gets annoyed when she wrecks his creations multiple times a day, but he’s learning that that’s part of the sibling deal. 😂

I’m slowly but surely getting my house back to a

I’m slowly but surely getting my house back to a baseline and it feels so good!

The past 3 months have been so rough with exposures, sickness, and the kids unpredictably home… a lot.

I have been so overwhelmed and burned out. And it always shows by the state of my house. Thankfully after a semi-normal week last week, I got a burst of energy on Sunday and cleaned up tons of clutter around the house.

It’s nice only having to spend a few minutes to get back to this state, rather than spending 20 minutes and it still looks terrible 😂

God, please spare me and give me an uneventful few months. I need it. 😅

Right now I’m in a season of change. It seems th

Right now I’m in a season of change. It seems that every 6ish months I find myself needing to mix things up. I’m not sure why I’m on this cadence, but I have felt really “off” for the past month-ish and I haven’t been able to put my finger on it.

I mean, honestly, it’s some level of burnout after our house has been a revolving door of colds from November through January… plus Omicron. Then getting Omicron. And working. And having my first real winter in 8 years.

I needed to have some time to regroup so I went to Panera by myself last weekend. I kinda just sat there putting random things in my Amazon cart for 45 minutes 😂. By the time I left, it hit me that I’m in-between seasons. Recognizing your situation is step 1, right??

I really need something to put my energy into, but I’ve had 0 drive and I feel too tired to come up with something. And the thought of trying sounds tiring. And I’m just really tired after being in a pandemic for 2 years with 2 kids.

But… I have been wanting a treadmill, so I ordered one on Amazon and I’m excited to move my body. I think that will help, and hopefully give me some more energy to come up with other things that will fill my bucket.

I also got my nose pierced yesterday, so that’s pretty cool. (I’m just being modest, I’m actually OBSESSED with it and it feels like a piece of me has been missing for 28 years. 😂)

Have you had this in-between seasons feeling? Or maybe just tiredness? Pandemic fatigue? Let’s take a collective nap. For 6 months, maybe. 😂

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